Midday Musings

Here we sit after another wonderful Sunday morning, eating the leftovers of our indian meal last night. I start classes tomorrow, and Daniel starts on Wednesday! Hurrah! I'm so excited to be starting. We had a wonderful evening last night -an unofficial "the summer is ending" celebration. We went out to with friends last night to the Music Row area. And while Music Row is not my favorite place in the world (last night it resembled the chaos of Mill Ave. at its most crowded, bleh), it was fun to shoot pool and talk with friends. But now school starts, and the all consuming, ever present "I should be studying right now" burden will be placed on my shoulders, ne'er to be lifted again - for two years, anyway. :)

And along the lines of school, I thought I'd share part of an e-mail I wrote to Gordon today. We've been discussing various education options (namely seminary vs. divinity school), and he asked why I would be thinking about the next step even before I've started classes. So here is little of what is on my heart right now:

"There are two reasons I'm thinking about the next step already. The first: after it looked like graduate school in Classics would not be a possibility for me, I felt a strong draw to seminary and it excited me. It felt like it fit. In a very real way, that experience made me view this MA program in light of seminary. I think that Vandy is a stop on the road to seminary, while Daniel gets on his feet. Second reason: the first thing the Department Head said to us was to consider each class and each paper and each activity in light of what our post-MA goal is. For good or for bad, from the beginning of college the education system requires us to look ahead and plan toward our ultimate goal. The Lord can work anything out for me (obviously, as I am reminded every day I'm on the Vandy campus), but if I see Vandy as a means to the end (seminary), I have a responsibility to make choices that will help me down that road.

What I want to do after Vandy - I will preface what I'm about to say with the full knowledge that things may drastically change, and I am open to that. I may decide I'm actually called to raise llamas (unlikely, but hey . . .), and I'm open to change. But at this moment, and for the past several months, I feel that I am being led to teach Greek in a seminary setting. My gift is Greek and my passion is Greek - in a very real way I feel it is a waste to dedicate my life to Greek unless it's to teach people Greek to facilitate their roles in the body of Christ. This is what the Lord has put on my heart in the last few months. And if this is my calling, the Lord will work out the details, as He worked out the details so that we could here in Nashville together.

So I want to gear my two years toward that, and take hold of the opportunities before me. The human factors may dictate that we are to stay in Nashville for a few years. In terms of a divinity school: studying the Bible in a community of people who are not all seeking God is disconcerting, but not daunting. But the truth is, statistically I am an anomaly - people in higher education are not supposed to be Christians, so the world thinks. It will be spiritually an uphill battle no matter what school I go to, or what career I prepare myself for. And while the thought of being totally surrounded in my academic environment by followers of God that are passionate about Him and His work is very appealing and comforting (and that makes seminary so appealing), I have a very real sense of the urgency and importance of keeping Him first in and out of a community like that. My relationship with the Lord is my responsibility, and I am confident that I can grow in Him at a divinity school, at a seminary, or at a totally secular institution. Knowing and loving God is my goal, regardless of the environment I'm in. High school and college have taught me that, as well as my choice in friendships and relationships. Though, I think both Daniel and I have lately realized how important it is to fellowship and receive godly encouragement - and that does mean more than just Sunday morning. I do see how the two environments must be integrated and balanced, as you have said."

This comes after finding that Vandy has a PhD program comparable to the one I was so excited about at Fuller. Thoughts, feelings, reactions, advice? It would be much appreciated!